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Inside the News by Mpakoo – All pieces appearing in this column are satire

All pieces appearing in this column are satire

Secret recording captures Ofosu Kwakye admitting presidential diaries printed with ‘sakawa’ money

Special Wednesday edition of Inside the News The Deputy Communications Minister, Felix Ofosu Kwakye, has been heard saying in a secretly recorded conversation, exclusively available to Inside the News, that the printing of the controversial presidential diaries was sponsored by sakawa boys. He, however, insisted that government was not aware …

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Peace FM newsreaders to be recruited as teachers for national language policy – Education Minister

The Hon Minister of Education, Prof Naana Jane Opoku-Agyemang has revealed that the Ghana Education Service is about to seal a deal with Osei Kwame Despite, owner of Peace FM, which will see newsreaders from the station moving to classrooms across the country to teach pupils in the basic schools. …

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AMA to congratulate mayor on successful demolition exercise that stopped Accra floods

The Accra Metropolitan Assembly (AMA) is expected to issue a press statement in the coming days to formally congratulate the Lord Mayor of Accra, Hon Alfred Okoe Vanderpuije, on what they describe as ‘the roaring success’ of the recent demolition exercise which prevented a disastrous flood on Friday. ‘The mayor …

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‘They can’t do me foko’ – Paul Afoko to NPP Disciplinary Committee

NPP National Chairman, Paul Afoko, has sent a sweet, little love message to the NPP Disciplinary Committee after snubbing an invitation to appear before the body to be queried for misconduct. ‘Please tell them I said they can’t “do me” foko’, Mr Afoko told journalists who questioned him about his …

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Pastor likens the daughter of Rawlings to the Son of God

A powerfully anointed charismatic pastor of an Accra-based mega-church has compared the trials and tribulations that Ezanetor Rawlings is suffering at the hands of the Klottey Korle constituency branch of the NDC to the sufferings that Jesus endured at the hands of the nation of Israel. ‘The Daughter of Rawlings …

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John Mahama and the epidemic of madness

They are crazy! They’ve gone absolutely insane! Someone call Profit (sorry Prophet) T. B. Joshua!’ President Mahama is now the centre of gravity of a gathering storm of an epidemic of madness. Earlier in the year, the Chief Psychiatrist at the Accra Psychiatric Hospital, Dr Akwesi Osei, warned that if …

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Kufuor prophesies nation-wide plague of yeast infection

Former President John Agyekum Kufuor has prophesied that a massive plague of yeast infection is about to hit every corner of the country, with wonderful consequences for all bakers in Ghana. Using his Oxford English, the man fondly known as ‘The Gentle Giant’ predicted that the consequence of this plague …

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Let everyone bloat the voters’ register in their own world bank – Fiifi Kwetey

The NDC MP for Ketu South, Honourable Fiifi Kwetey, has suggested that all political parties should be left alone to bloat the voters’ register in their strongholds, claiming that this is the only democratic solution to the ongoing controversy over the integrity of the register ahead of the 2016 polls. …

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