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Government introduces new currency for unpaid public sector workers

CedisUnpaid public sector workers can now buy goods at the various markets across the country using government assurances, popularly known as Mahama Promises.

Analysts at the Ghana Stock Exchange report that the new currency, Mahama Promise, has a higher value than the Ghana cedi, and shows remarkable robustness against foreign currencies like the US dollar and the UK pound sterling.

Highly encouraging reports from selected markets in Accra indicate that one unit of Mahama Promise can purchase two bowls of tomatoes, a bowl of garden eggs, two bunches of bananas, lots of pepper, many pieces of Maggi cubes, four gallons of Frytol, eight pieces of yam, lots of cassava, plenty of fish, some meat, one piece of made-in-Ghana wax print, and a year-long uninterrupted power supply.

The Minister of Finance, Honourable Seth Tekper, has praised the president for coming up with this home-grown solution to the salary arrears of public workers. ‘This will ensure that public sector workers will not feel stranded until next two years when their salaries will be finally ready,’ he told our correspondents.

Meanwhile, the troubles on the labour front just took a turn for the outlandish after one of the striking doctors, Dr Jones Gyedu, issued a bizarre threat to government communicator, Sam George. This comes after Sam George had accused the doctor of spanking the monkey in public.

The doctor made a solemn promise to inject Sam George with the drug Quinolones next time he visits a health centre: ‘I have diagnosed this man with coccidiosis,’ Dr Gyedu said, ‘and it is my patriotic duty to cure him of it.’

Facebook users will be aware that this is not the first time Sam George has taken to the social media site to insult persons who have disagreements with his party. And his superiors in the Flagstaff House do not want this to be his last time.

Editor’s note: The ‘Inside the News by Mpakoo’ column which appears every Monday exclusively on ghanabusinessnews.com is satire.

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