Touch not my anointed and do my Anas no harm

Anas Aremeyaw Anas
Anas Aremeyaw Anas

Martin Amidu, the former Attorney-General who introduced the word ‘Gargantuan’ into popular Ghanaian vocabulary, is no longer in the good books of Ghanaians.

The self-acclaimed Citizen-Vigilante incurred the self-righteous indignation of the Ghanaian moral public for daring to question the motives, methods, and malfeasance likely to have been committed in Anas’ investigative work.

Martin Amidu, whose voluminous press releases were until recently eagerly anticipated and voraciously consumed by the scandal-hungry public, has now totally exhausted his goodwill:

‘Anas is our anti-corruption superhero. He is our sacred cow,’ said a member of the vocal public, ‘if you touch him, we will bite you!’

The public also insists that the best way to fight corruption was by devolving the responsibility from the institutions constitutionally mandated to carry out the fight onto Anas:

‘We walk by faith and not by sight. So although we have never seen his face before, and we never know who he is, we are sure that it is God who gave him to Mother Ghana to make our fight against corruption sensational and entertaining. How dare Martin Amidu raise legitimate concerns about the legality of his methods!’ our reporter was told by a member of the public.

In the meantime, President Mahama is heaving a huge sigh of relief in the Flagstaff House, as are his ministers Seth Tekper, whose budget statement, and Dr Kwabena Donkor, whose cluelessness about the current status of the power barge, escaped public notice last week.

However, Dr Bawumia, NPP Vice-Presidential Candidate, has vowed to burst the government’s temporary bubble of relief:

‘I have been working hard in the studios, and very soon, I’ll be releasing a remix of the Tekper’s budget!’

Editor’s note: The ‘Inside the News by Mpakoo’ column which appears every Monday exclusively on is satire.

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